In the past years, I have made several presentations on “Soft Skills” to my teams.  I tell my audiences that these skills can be learned, that we are not born with them.   To illustrate my point, I often cite new-born babies as perfect examples of individuals with zero soft skills.  They care not a whit about where they are (context), what time it is (timing) or that they are screaming (sense of proportion) when they are in any discomfort.

It however occurs to me that perhaps one of the greatest “soft skills” we can have is perhaps not even a skill, in a strict sense.  I am talking about a personality trait that we are all able to recognize instantly when we see it: a positive attitude.  This is the attitude that makes people easy to work with.  It allows a person to look for and find opportunities for personal development, and not get bogged down with defeatist thoughts when faced with hardships.  The following is a small catalog of ways we can demonstrate this rare and valuable quality:

Willingness to learn from mistakes
This is the ability to look at oneself objectively to identify areas for improvement in performance, to learn from experience, to ask questions and correct mistakes without feeling defeated, resentful, or insulted.  This is one of the most challenging soft skills, which is why it’s typically one of the most impressive to employers.

Ability to take and give criticism in the right spirit
Learn to absorb criticism and suggestions for improvement in the right spirit.  Be aware of how defensive you get in reaction to negative feedback.  Never reject a piece of constructive criticism completely without acknowledging that at least part of it is helpful.  And when you provide criticism, are you diplomatic?  Know how the personality of the person you are criticizing and how he / she will react to your feedback, and shape your words accordingly.  Your ability to handle criticism says a lot about your willingness to improve, and being able to criticize the work of others constructively is just as important.

Enthusiasm
Seeing the glass as half full instead of half empty is the type of positive thinking that is much appreciated in the workplace.  A general positive outlook can be a valuable asset in work environments that could breed cynicism and negativity.  When the overall approach of a person is cheerful and tolerant of differences, it sends out a positive message.  It is axiomatic of life that we usually see what we look for.  A person that thinks positively finds opportunities.

Look for windows when doors shut.  Look at every obstacle as a challenge, as an opportunity to solve a problem and to prove your worth and abilities.  Think: would you like your team members to come to you with solutions or with complaints?  Enthusiasm is infectious and people will want to work with you.  They will start looking for areas of improvement on their own for their drivers will start becoming internal.

Confidence in oneself
In almost every situation, confidence is key.  While it is important to accept your limitations, it’s also important to acknowledge your strengths and embrace them.  Make sure you have the knowledge and skills to back up your confidence.  If you have confidence in some of your job-related skills – like your written communication, project management skills or leadership abilities – make sure that it is based on genuine, positive reinforcement.  Unsurprisingly, confidence is the most important factor in promoting effective problem solving.

Are you a self-starter?
It’s important for your employer to know that you’re a self-starter who shows initiative.  This means constantly seeking out new ways to keep your job interesting and motivational, even if it at the surface it seems repetitive and mundane.  Creativity plays a big role in this, but it is more than that.  Have the courage to pursue those ideas you’ve parked in the back of your mind, and have the dedication to follow through with them to completion.  Pilot others in the same direction to work towards a common goal.  Remember that a good leader leads by example.

Take ownership
When you send a work-product to the client or anyone else, are you proud to put your name on it?  If others’ inputs are needed, are you willing to follow-up and complete or are you content to merely pass the buck?  This aspect of one’s attitude is essentially about pride in our work.  Our work speaks of us and will largely determine if our client wants to return to us.

Invest in yourself
While one never really stops learning, you can keep interested in your career by pro-actively updating your skills or adding new ones.  Read articles on your domain, industry or practice and stay in touch with the zeitgeist of the day.  A big part of staying positive is after all, looking forward, not falling behind.